Things Keeping Me Busy:

A few years ago Doug volunteered his services and became a member of the Medical Reserve Corps. They meet quarterly and discuss protocol in case of emergencies. After taking care of their own families, in an emergency situation, they are to report to a central location and will then be first responders.

Last week the MRC members were "activated".

I'm still trying to figure out what I think about all this H1N1.

Looks like things are getting serious around here.

*******************************************************

#1

M R C Members Alert:

M R C members have been activated by the TriCounty
Health Department Director. A special meeting will be held on Tuesday
October 20th at 7 PM at the TriCounty Health Department in -------- to
discuss the details. Please confirm receipt of this mandated activation.
This is a high priority alert.

#2

MRC Members,

PLEASE READ - IMPORTANT MRC Volunteers will be activated for upcoming H1N1 vaccination clinics.

I hope this finds everyone having a wonderful Friday. As you may have heard, a new influenza virus, called the 2009 H1N1 influenza virus, was first identified in the United States in late April 2009. The virus has caused illness ranging from mild to severe, including hospitalizations and deaths in adults and children. Many children have gotten the 2009 H1N1 infection and there have been large outbreaks in some schools across the country. The Center for Disease Control and Prevention's (CDC) Advisory Committee on Immunization Practices has recommended that children and young adults aged 6 months through 24 years be vaccinated against 2009 H1N1 as soon as possible. In order to vaccinate our community against the H1N1 the need for the activation of our MRC Volunteers has been directed.

TriCounty Health Department will start additional H1N1 vaccination clinics on Thursday and Friday evening. The start date for these clinics will depend on available vaccine and start dates will be distributed when we are sure we have the vaccine available to hold clinics. The clinics will be held at the TriCounty Health Department building and will run from 5 PM - 8 PM.

MRC volunteers are needed to staff these clinics and provide the support needed to vaccinate our community in a orderly and timely fashion. ALL volunteers will be needed and be able to staff clinical stations during these additional clinics.

This is a critical announcement and we are calling on our MRC volunteers to support, rise up and uphold their comment as a MRC Community Volunteer. Volunteers are needed on Thursdays and Fridays from 5 PM - 8 PM until further notice. Again I will send out an announcement as soon as we know we will have the vaccine available.

MRC Members who will be supporting this cause will have the opportunity to come into the Health Department prior to these clinics to get a H1N1 vaccination. We would wish to have those who are going to volunteer and support the upcoming clinics have the vaccination 7 days prior to the first on site clinic. The H1N1 vaccination is not mandatory.

Please respond by Monday on your availability.

Again this is a time and a community situation which requires our MRC Volunteers to be there in support.

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Last week Jake was actually pretty sick. I looked on-line at the symptoms and home treatments for H1N1. He had all the symptoms, but since he never got so sick that I felt like he needed to see a physician we just let it ride itself out. So we don't REALLY know if he had H1N1, but he definitely had some kind of a flu. A lot of people here have been confirmed with H1N1, and a 31 year old man died here last week.

What do you all think? How are you dealing with this? Are you doing things differently?

It is kind of crazy, isn't it?

So. Yesterday something possessed me and I felt like cooking. A lot. Of different things.

I went to the grocery store and stood in front of the meat section somewhat befuddled and then the butcher came out and I started asking him questions. Lots of them. I probably stood there talking with him for a good ten minutes. Asking him all sorts of meat questions. I had the thought that he might have been asking himself how someone as obviously old as I am has been able to get to this point in life and be so amazingly clueless about meat and what to do with it.

I didn't explain all my years of going meatless and how when I became pregnant with Abbie I decided to eat meat "for the baby" and I haven't been able to go back to the meatless ways yet.

Anyway, he helped me get the kind of meat I needed for what I was going to make, and I went on my merry way, undeterred by the lateness of the dinner hour.

You see, two friends have recently asked me if I've made The Pioneer Woman's Steak Bites yet, and I haven't and I was told in no uncertain terms that I "HAVE TO MAKE THEM!".

So I did.

And I forgot to take a picture.

But they pretty much looked like this:

(Pioneer Woman's Steak Bites from thepioneerwoman.com)

Just on MY plate. Hers do actually look better. But I'm sure mine tasted as good.

And I also made Crash Hot Potatoes. But you already know that I am making those every few weeks.

And the family gobbled everything up. They were in a mild state of disbelief that I had made such cowboy food for them.

I also made her Apple Tart only we don't have the puff pastry in our little grocery store so I bought Phyllo dough instead. And it worked fine. A little baclava-ish, but good none-the-less.

So, yes, I spent a lot of time in the kitchen again last night. But it was pretty fun and everyone did enjoy the food.

But what I really want to talk about is this:

I used fresh lemon on the sliced up apples ( I used Granny Smiths) and tossed the apple slices around and then put the brown sugar in and tossed them around again.

When I cut into that lemon I was overcome by the smell. I wondered how long it had been since I've smelled an honest-to-goodness lemon. Not a lemon scent. Not Realemon from the bottle. Real I-just-cut-this-lemon-after-rolling-it-on-the-counter-to-make-it-juicy Lemon.

I was taken away to a new place. A real place. A sweet citrusy place.

And I liked it.

And the leftover Granny Smith apples slices covered in lemony brown sugar? Wow. That was as good as anything else last night.

It made me think that I need to have more real lemons in my life.

I think that when life brings me sweetened lemon-aid and I'm tempted to go for the soothing distraction, I need to say "No thanks. I want the real lemon."

Wish I had...Glad I Did

Thinking back on things

I wish I had done more of this...

...and not worried so much about the mess or the chaos

(Making cookies with the boys in Dec. 1996)

And

I'm glad that I did this...

...living in the moment with my four boys and the blue sky

(Fall, 1996)

...and all eight legs and feet
small to big.

(Fall, 1996)

Blink.

12+ years have passed.

Lesson learned.

For The Beauty Of The Earth

I've been doing a lot of thinking.

I've been thinking about our purpose on this earth; thinking about the gifts of life and agency; thinking about the difference between happiness and joy; thinking about what matters and what does not and which I'm giving my energy to.

As mother of younger children I read an article which set me to thinking. This article talked about the gap that usually occurs between generations regarding values and beliefs. I read that parents shouldn't just assume that their children are going to automatically take their parent's value system as their own. I couldn't imagine this would be true! When every part of the day and night was full of our value system, when everything I tried to do with and for my children spoke our value system, how could they not know and understand? 

Dang. I didn't think enough about one thing. That gift of life called "agency".

While these thoughts-and many others-have been swirling around in my head, I read the book The Good Earth by Pearl S. Buck. I had never read this book all the way through, and never as a 53 year old mother. 

This is what stood out to me from this book:

Our children won't necessarily adopt our value system as their own, even if they've seen us sacrifice for and work and LIVE that value system their whole lives. There isn't an automatic transferral.

hummmm...

What is it that causes some children to automatically walk into their adult lives with the things they've been taught deeply rooted in them and other children to not? Why are some children more easily swayed by the winds of change? Does birth order really matter? What about the space between children? How much of it is just the kind of spirits they came with? How do I, as a mother who wiped away tears and cleaned up blood and tried to always have a hug and a you-can-do-it cheer ready, how do I stand by, and let a child figuratively run out onto a busy highway, without jumping up and down and yelling "Stop! Stop! You're going to get hurt!!" Do I really have to let them get so scratched up?

I guess I do. That agency thing.

I just hope they know that they will always be able to come home for a rest and a mother-hug, there will always be a place for them in my heart and home. I know I can't fix all the hurts the way I once was able to do, but if my arms wrapped around any one of my children can make a difference at any time then I'll do that. I've always been a somewhat ferocious-mother-bear-with-her-claws-out when I sensed any of my children were in danger, and I'm finding that hasn't changed even as they start moving into adulthood.

It is a hard thing to be a mother bear.

Update to 4/27

Thank you to all of my friends and family who called or e-mailed me to see if I'm "alright". I appreciate you.

I am fine. Without going too much into the junk of life may I just say: "Motherhood is not for sissies." Life is much easier when you only have yourself to fret about. It is a wonder how many times my heart can be broken and still continue to beat. 

But beat it does. The beat goes on and so will I. 

Just a gentle reminder to be kind to everyone. We just don't know what hidden sorrows people have.

And with that, I am off to BYU for my annual retreat to Women's Conference where I'll join with thousands of like-minded women and be taught and strengthened and edified. This year I'm going with my friend, Ronda, and we'll stay in the dorms and have a grand 'ol time together!

Mockingbirds

Atticus. Jem. Scout.

We just finished our Saturday Night movie night.

What a great movie.

Makes me want to read the book again.

Why aren't there great movies like this anymore?

What a great example Atticus is, on all sorts of levels.

Why do I let so much time go by without seeing this movie? Or reading the book?

The pizza is put away and the kitchen is cleaned up and I'm thinking about life while I listen to the rain.

What's In Your Future?

Today's reading assignment is, once again, from Seth Godin.

Read and Think.

Soon

This...

is what I am waiting for.

Miss Abbie
brought me these flowers
in March
two years ago.

These are the
First Flowers of Spring
for me.

I've been getting them every year
for the past
22 years
and I expect to get some
this year also.

I hope I get some this year!

What if Miss Abbie
has grown up too much?
What if she realizes
there are "better" flowers
to be had?
That would be the
End Of An Era.
That would be too sad.

One of those things
that I never gave any thought to.
Now that it might be ending
I'm thinking about it a lot.

What else am I not thinking about
that I should?

Wii Are a Family

We spent some time at Gramma's house last weekend, and the three older boys were also there. Before we ate (and after we ate, actually) we spent some time on our Wii, which we took to Gramma's.

(As an aside: because I am writing about the Wii system, every time I write the word we I think the word Wii and it is messing with my head. In my two sentences above I used we five times, and I kept thinking Wii instead of we. I'm getting confused. D'ya think that is the point?)

I'm still not so sure about this way to experience life. Yes, we have had a bit of fun with the thing. But what have we given up? 

There is something about the picture I took that really bothers me.

I need to think about this some more. 

Today's Reading Assignment

We're off to a wedding. 

Read this today: Seth's Blog

Here Comes The Sun

My dad was an Air Force pilot and so we lived in and traveled to some pretty fun and interesting places. From 1968-70 we lived on the tropical island of Guam. I was in Jr. High School during those years. It was a very fun existence, a really fun time. 

I spent a lot of time in the sun during those two years on Guam. We practically lived at the Officer's Pool, swimming, tanning, ordering a Shirley Temple and fries at the snack bar. Oh, it was a good life. 

While we were there a military girl, Hilary Best, won the title of Miss Guam and went on to compete in the Miss Universe pageant. I would see her at the pool and was very envious of her tan. She. Was. Tan.

So what does an impressionable 13 year old do? Copy. No matter that I was a freckle-face. No matter that I didn't have the kind of skin that would glow golden bronze. 

The going thing back then? Olive oil. Yes. The stuff you brown your meat in. It made sense. Brown meat. I'm meat. I can brown. Brown me!

WHAT WERE WE THINKING??

To her credit, my Mom did say once that she didn't think it was a good idea to use olive oil as sun tan oil.  But this was, after all, long before skin cancer was invented or SPF or any of that kind of thing...

AND! The Beatles had just given us our Anthem.

Here comes the sun, here comes the sun, 

and I say it's all right 

Little darling, it's been a long cold lonely winter 

Little darling, it feels like years since it's been here 

Here comes the sun, here comes the sun 

and I say it's all right 

Little darling, the smiles returning to the faces 

Little darling, it seems like years since it's been here 

Here comes the sun, here comes the sun 

and I say it's all right 

Sun, sun, sun, here it comes... 

Sun, sun, sun, here it comes... 

Sun, sun, sun, here it comes... 

Sun, sun, sun, here it comes... 

Sun, sun, sun, here it comes... 

Little darling, I feel that ice is slowly melting 

Little darling, it seems like years since it's been clear 

Here comes the sun, here comes the sun, 

and I say it's all right 

It's all right 

We were blissfully unaware.

After Guam I spent time tanning in the sun of California. Years later in the sun of Panama. Long Island. High altitude Utah.

And in that time skin cancer was invented. And SPF lotions. And now I'm just sort of waiting, and watching my abused skin manifest skin damage. Or worse.

Del Rey beat me to the big one, though. Some months ago he showed me a funny red patch on the side of his face that wasn't going away. We watched it for another month or so, and I finally said he needed to get it checked. Yesterday he had his appointment with the dermatologist and yes, he had himself a bit of pre-skin-cancer going on. The doc burned it off with liquid nitrogen. Yesterday he had a pretty big blister on the side of his face. When I saw it last night it made my knees weak and my throat kind of constrict. 

So this is actually a Public Service Announcement:

Do use sun screen.

Don't use olive oil.

Get your 15 minutes a day of sun for Vitamin D, but don't go overboard.

Watch your skin for "a sore that does not heal" (remember learning that in grade school? Hey, maybe skin cancer WAS invented back then...)

Have the skin doc look at funny things on your body.

Tans are over-rated. Hilary Best probably looks 20 years older nowadays than she really is.

Thank you for your time.

Whew!

So.

I got through my physical today.

It has almost been two years since I've had

one of those

kinds of physicals.

I need a few days to get my balance back.

ha ha ha ha!

Not really.

It wasn't that bad.

But just in case it was-

I'm in my art room working on some things

and loving that when I sit at my desk

this...

is what I see.

My seashells

in all their bits and pieces

from San Diego

and they give me peace.

And when I look past

and out the window

I see the melting of the snow.

And today the wind is blowing Spring our way.

We always get winds when Spring is coming.

A very fine day.

Habits-7 of Them

Many years ago, I think it was in the Fall of 1980, I took an Organizational Behavior class at BYU and the instructor was Stephen R. Covey. I needed to take this class for my major and had no idea what it would be about. I was familiar with Covey because I had read Spiritual Roots of Human Relations and How to Succeed with People. What I didn't know was that this would be the one class from college that I would carry with me through my life. I also didn't know that the class notes I faithfully took would eventually be included in two future books of Covey's: The Divine Center and 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. 

I was so blessed-lucky-fortunate to get to take that class that year. He didn't teach it the following semester and he then started phasing out of teaching, so I feel VERY blessed-lucky-fortunate for that semester.

I still have my class notes, yes, in sheet protectors and in a binder.

And here is the first page of notes I took in that class, and the "lesson" that made the most profound impact on my life, and the lesson I have tried to pass along as often as I have the opportunity:

This is the lesson of the 1st Habit: Be Proactive. This is when I heard it all plainly explained that in the four levels of 'being' (human-animal-plant-rock), humans have self-awareness and free agency. In the animal world there is no space between a Stimulus and a REACTION. But as humans we have a space between every Stimulus and our RESPONSE. It may only be a nano-second, but in that moment we CHOOSE what our RESPONSE will be. This is a hard thing for people to accept who don't like to take responsibility for themselves. In 1980 I found this to be one of the most exciting thoughts I'd ever had.

Covey went on to teach us that when we understand this, that we always choose our response and how we feel, then we will understand that no one can "make " us feel bad/sad/angry/happy etc. We are choosing how we want to feel.

(That makes it really hard to have an argument with your husband: "Errrrrrrrrgh! I have chosen to be so mad at you!!!)

Here are three quotes from my notes that day:

The last ultimate freedom is to choose the response. (And he referenced Frankle in Man's Search for Meaning.) 

You hurt yourself. You consent to be hurt. You are not your body. People hurt your body but don't let them hurt your soul.

The solution is to change the heart-you really can't change the environment.

These were very liberating concepts for me to think about and they are powerful concepts. This is important enough that through the years I have tried to teach it to my children. Hopefully someday they will "get it".

Until then, I'll keep trying to teach it.

Last fall I found a book by one of Covey's sons, the son who wrote the 7 Habits for Teens. This book is for kids.

I've been reading this to Jake and Abbie in our devotional. We read one chapter (habit) a week. We talk about it, what it means, how they can incorporate the habit in their lives. The habits are taught in parable, no lecture here. 

At the end of each parable is a page for the parents, so we can help make the connection.

There is a reason why the first habit is The-First-Habit. I continually work on this habit and after 29-ish years of conscious effort I think I'm getting fairly good at choosing wisely. I've also realized that this expands to the place where I want to live a life that doesn't create an environment for another person to 'choose' to feel badly. I understand that we all have a choice, but I hope I can keep trying to live my life so that I don't tempt anyone to choose poorly. 

That's a whole other level of consciousness...