Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Spot Free Rinse


In the midst of all the festivities last Saturday I needed to help Jake get ready for his week of Especially For Youth at BYU which started on Monday. This is Jake's third year going to EFY and he was very excited. 

So.  Jake, Abbie and I were doing some errands in town before we headed over to the bigger town to go to TheWalMart. One of our stops was the car wash because the truck was pretty bug-splattered and needed a good washing. As I sat in the truck, making up a silly story (yes, to a 16 and a 10 year old...) while the machine washed our truck, I was also thinking about how different this was from my growing up years. How different it was even from the earlier years of my marriage.

We  ALWAYS washed our car ourselves.

And I wondered about which is the better way to do this? Does it really matter? I paid five bucks to sit in the concrete cave and let a machine pretty effectively clean the truck in five or so minutes. Jake and Abbie and I were sitting together and I was making them crazy with the stupid story I was telling and we had a few chuckles together.

We weren't out on the lawn together with the bucket and hose soaping up the truck and teasing one another with the spray of the water, laughing and playing while we got the work done.

Wait a minute. Even when we DID hand wash our cars, it was never really all that fun. The experience was usually kind of spotted with complaining and a sense of "just get the job done so we can do something else". Then when the car dried and the missed spots would become obvious, that was always fun to call kids back for the re-do. 

My questions are these: Are my kids missing something that could be crucial for them because we use the car wash? Is there some work ethic they aren't learning because we don't wash our cars at home? Am I teaching them to find the easy way out, or is this helping them develop a better sense of time management (spend more sweat and time on the things that are really important)? I don't use a wringer washer or hang my clothes on the line to dry, I have a high-efficiency-front-loading washer and dryer and my laundry time is cut in half (so that I have time to blog???) 

This led me down that path of a hundred questions for which I have no answers.

I tell you what. This parenting thing ain't for sissies. I've been doing it for almost 24 years and I'm still questioning myself.

Then again, maybe I'm thinking too much. It was just a car wash. Or was it?

See? I'm just not sure...



2 comments:

Bonnie said...

Ahh, this is a good one, Shaun! I have been thinking about it and this is what I would offer. More important to me than how the car gets washed is that a good work ethic is taught in a home so that when kids grow up they do not have that entitlement thing going on.

In the YSA ward we saw a lot of kids, who were really young adults who seriously did not know how to work. They were so use to everyone else providing that the thought of being independent kind of baffled them. They sometimes felt that they shouldn't have to wash a car..let's just say.

My philosophy is that all kids need to be taught to work and work hard so that they can survive in this crazy world that requires them to have money that they sooner or later have to earn.

Just from the way I have grown to know you and your family I can bet this is not an issue in your family. Your kids have parent that are totally vested in their success and also hard workers. The best thing I have observed is all the love and togetherness and family fun you have created. Those things will be a motivator for each of them to repeat the success they have grown up with.

So ...no worries....go to the carwash. They have everything going for them! EFY...fabulous!

Gone Gal said...

If this wasn't meant to be funny, then I'm scared.